A List Maker's Life: To Be Known

Friday, May 28, 2010

To Be Known

When asked if we would find out if the baby was a boy or a girl my answer has always been,

"Either would fit perfectly in our family.  I just want healthy."

More than just a pat answer we truly believed it. 

We did, however, discuss that we would find out baby #4's gender at our 20 week appointment.  With that decision I brainstormed this little plan to have the tech write it down for us and seal it in an envelope.  Perhaps we would have a fun blue and pink party with just our immediate family or a big group of friends for the reveal.

The tech did just that.  Wrote it done and tucked it away for us to celebrate later.

That was then.

After we stumbled out of the office an hour later, after having met with our doctor, we knew that our baby wasn't healthy.  We really didn't know what to say, what to do, how to react, or where to go.  Kevin headed north on US31 and we just drove.  And drove.  Our secret envelope unopened, but not forgotten.

Somewhere before we hit Grand Haven it hit me, "Kevin, I need to know now.  If it's true that we will only have a few months to love this little one I need to know now.  Our baby needs a name."

Kevin, trying to make things right in any way he humanly knows how started to dig out the envelope and pull to the side of the road.

"No, it needs to be special.  I can't find out on the highway.  I guess I'm not ready."

Driving further down the road our dear, confused little people in the backseat were getting antsy and thirsty.  We pulled off at the gas station to buy water and gummy worms to appease.  Again he handed me the envelope.  I considered it briefly, while holding it up to the light, but couldn't stand the thought of our story being "we learned who you were while sitting at the gas station."

As it turned out I suggested that we just pick Gavin up early from school and head home to find out together.  On the way to school we brainstormed how we would explain our news to our very intuitive five year old.  And that's when we decided that we would start with a celebration. 

Moments after pulling Gavin out of class, and sharing big hugs, he was the one to open our secret envelope - right there in the school parking lot.  To shout out in his new found reading voice, "It says 'It's a BOY'."

A baby boy who our family already loves with all of our hearts. 

We are so glad to know him and we would love for you to know him too.  So, at this point I say (and please excuse me) "screw the rules"  this baby boy deserves a name.  A special name.  A name that means something about all that he is and all that he is teaching us.  He needs a name that we can specifically and confidently pray. 

And it looks like we have some work to do.

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19 comments:

  1. Sweet baby boy!!!! My husband and I are praying for a complete healing for your son Katie. Praying for your comfort too!

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  2. My mind has been busy at work since seeing you last night. Noah and Joshua are the first that come to mind. Something strong....

    Cadence, Foster and Carter are more "trendy" ones.
    I will keep thinking!

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  3. praying for "him" until he gets a special name

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  4. Gabriel-it means God is my strength.


    I think about you daily, and continue to pray.

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  5. Joel- The Lord is God
    Abel- breath
    Noah- rest/comfort
    David- beloved
    Jeremiah- God will raise up
    Matias/Matthias- Gift of God
    Jonathan- God has given
    Solomon- peace
    Zachary/Zachariah- The Lord Remembers

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  6. Katie
    My heart goes out to you and your family! Ever since I found out you are on my mind and I continue to pray and believe that God is the gift of life. This boy is special and I agree he needs a very special name ...while I don't have a name for you I know God does... I will be praying! Love you guys!!! Please let me know if I can help in anyway .. your kids are always welcome here!

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  7. I think that is a wonderful idea. Much love to you, Katie.

    xo elizabeth

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  8. And I have no doubt in my mind that you will find for him the most perfect name.

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  9. Our family is praying for yours. I found you via another blog. I am a complete stranger but was lead to your blog and your situation. We will send up a prayer for your special, wonderful baby boy. And excited to read the name when you pick it.

    Prayers from AZ

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  10. I'm loving the name Evan which is derived from the name John and means "gracious gift of God." I know it is close to Kevin, but I think having a name similar to his father would add extra meaning. It also follows your "rules".

    I'll be praying that you find the perfect name soon. Until then he'll be in my prayers as sweet baby M.

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  11. Annie helped me with my list of suggestions:

    Bennett - Little Blessed One

    Vincent - Conquering

    Caleb - Faithful

    Joshua - God Rescues

    Dayton - Bright Sunny Town

    Andrew - Man, Warrior

    Ethan - Strong, Firm, Impetuous

    Micha - Who is like God?

    Nathan - God has given

    Gabriel - God is my might

    Ephraim - Fruitful

    Kevin - Beautiful at birth

    Wyatt - Brave, Strong, Hardy War

    Jason - Healer

    Kellan/Kellen - Warrior

    Tate - Cheerful

    Tristan - Bold

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  12. Eli Oliver "my God has answered me and given me Peace"

    praying and sending love your way...







    ps: Have you read "I Will Carry You" by Audrey's mom? might have some insight.

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  13. Katie,

    I just wanted to let you know that I just emailed you. Praying!!!

    Lisa

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  14. Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and praying for this little one being knit together in your womb today. Love you, sweet friend!

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  15. Katie, my heart is breaking for you and your family. Your beautiful post brought tears to my eyes. I just can't imagine. Just sending love...

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  16. You have been in my thoughts non-stop. The name will come to you and his name will be perfect.

    much love to you all
    xoxo

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  17. no matter the name, no matter the gender, your baby is loved, my friend.

    hugs and prayers from md--

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  18. Katie and Kevin,
    I can't wait to hear your baby boy's name. I am anxious to pray for him by name.
    As always.....praying.

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